Is it a gift or a curse when one always gets to experience and see both sides of a situation? Being able to see a situation as a whole, to completion, and from both sides of the spectrum.
For example:
Scenario 1
- Guy is fat/overweight, but his friends are not
- Guy gets teased/bullied at school, has the worst school life you can imagine
- Guy has had enough - hits the weights, takes charge of his health/fitness
- Years later, guy is now in excellent/admirable physical condition, but now, his friends are in bad shape (think beer bellies, overweight)
A privilege to be in control of his physique now… or a curse having to go through life’s happy years being teased/bullied?
Scenario 2
- Guy falls for Girl A, Girl A falls for the guy.
- Things start off well enough, but then Girl A pulls away because she’s not ready.
- Guy wonders why this has to happen to him.
As time goes by, still wondering why, the guy is then placed in the exact opposite role:
- Girl B falls for guy, guy falls for Girl B.
- Things start off well enough, but then this time, guy pulls away instead because he’s the one not ready this time.
- Girl B is left wondering why this has to happen to her.
From one angle, the guy has now actually experienced and will most likely understand why and how the first situation happened and also what Girl A went through - simply because he has been put in the exact same situation. But from another angle - Girl B is left being very hurt, and the Guy also KNOWS how much this can hurt as he’s been in the exact same situation before too.
A privilege to understand how someone felt… or a curse to have to end up hurting someone else to get there?
Scenario 3
- Guy despises habits such as smoking/consumption of alcohol
- Guy always used to wonder why do people drink? What benefit could it ever bring them?
- Then one fine day, he himself picks up such a habit
- Now, instead of advising people not to drink - he’s usually the one suggesting that people get together for a long night of alcohol/partying until everyone gets drunk.
A privilege to know what alcohol addiction must feel like… or a curse?
I’m reminded of this bit from Alanis Morissette’s “Ironic”..
Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
“Well isn’t this nice…”
For as long as I can remember.. my life has been full of situations like these. So what is it actually? Why me..? Am I having a bad dose of ‘What goes around, comes around’?
I think looking back - I’ve been very challenged by the many things that happen in my life. But interestingly enough, though these challenges hurt.. they have shaped me to be who I am today..
What are YOUR challenges in life? What’s holding you back from achieving your dreams? I’ll conclude with this bit, from the same song - Ironic..
Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything’s okay and everything’s going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything’s gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face
Have a Blessed 2007 everyone.
In anything you do.. never give up. Never, ever.
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{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
First of all…… Welcome back!
My challenges in life? Mmmm….. I wanna be able to do chin-ups! And also get my dog to like dogs…
do u believe in ‘Karma’?
You are back. Happy New Year 2007. Life is complicated, but whatever we are doing or living in, we gotta pursue it with all our hearts and do the best we can do. :)
you’re back! missed your posts ALOT!! happy 2007 DM.. :D
my challenges in life.. *sits back n starts thinking..*
hmmmm…
my challenges:-
1. able to shed off my extraaaaaaa pounds…Goal: 55 kg & 21% BF
2. have nice & sexy abs (for now, as long as i can have flat tummy i’m contented)
3. learn to LOVE myself & gain more self-confidence
4. be more hardworking (as in studying)
I’ve been Girl B twice.
Imaginary background music:
“Isn’t it ironic ….. “
my challenges (physically speaking) for now.. heading bac 2 e 4x/wk gym routine after a looong 3.5 mth break..
lose abdominal blubber..
tone up arms..
tone thigh/calf muscles
perk that butt up
lol..
Hi welcome back! It’s been quite a while since you posted.
Privilege or curse..as long as in the end you leave the situation with something positive. Below are my 2-sen’s worth:
Scenario 1: Privilege - guy should just disregard curse, don’t look back and go full steam ahead with his new healthy lifestyle- why dwell on past when the future is much brighter?
Scenario 2: Privilege for all the guys/girls - because being able to put yourself in another’s shoes will make you a more tolerant and understanding individual, in other words, a better person. Again no point looking back, right?
Scenario 3: I think this can either be a privilage or curse. In the end, someone should point it out to the guy(unless he realises it himself) to exercise moderation. But for people who are hooked, it must be hard to tread the line between moderation and excess, right?
Looking forward to reading more of your posts, DM!
welcome back dude. been a while. Thought you had gone somewhere.
Have a happy new year.
psharlene: To achieve that.. you first gotta start trying… a few everyday, until it becomes part of your everyday routine. :) The chin-ups I mean.
chikanoz: No, I don’t believe in Karma - but i do believe in a reason for everything that happens. It’s just that at times… the reason is not so clear. Maybe 10 years down the road, it will become clear.
suN: I missed updating and replying everyone at dailymuscle.com too! Btw, I like your 4th goal.
The Dumb: Excellent goals. Now make sure you actually do something about them to make those goals become a reality.
amirfuadh: Its been quite some time since you commented too. Thanks for your input - I admire how you always go into details and take the time and effort to give your views!
stupe: I’ve been busy. Really, really, really busy. It all started when I went to Bali in November. To make things worse, my notebook hard disk drive decided to die on me recently - losing all my mails, designs, brain dumps, half-written write ups, personal photos, unedited thoughts, the list just goes on. My last backup is about a year old.. that’s not much help.
Happy New Year everyone. I’m back.
Some mofo smacked the rear of this mofo’s Proton DeathStar and ran off, another mofo took a swing at some other mofos digicam and this mofo has to pay the damages and my mofomoto mobile decides its time to retire leaving all the mofos phone number in mofo land.
Privillege or Curse…?
hmm… sounds liek you’re in deep thoughts these days. I think the book WHEN BAD THINGS HAPPENS TO GOOD PPL might suit your mood right now :) anyways…. good to see fresh articles up and runnning again
**A very interesting article that I bumped into over the internet. Thought I could share it with you guys**
I am doing my masters degree research on the topic of attitudes towards bodybuilders and here are some of the non-biased points that we have found in our research so far. I am doing sociological research on this aspect and have also involved with sports coaching for around ten years now.
It is a primal instinct in men to have qualities of muscle size and strength, because that is how you protected your woman and protected your belongings from other men and beasts as well. Also, if you had these qualities you could beat up the other weaker man and probably take his woman and his goods. Though in today’s modern, civilized society we don’t live like that, the fact remains that a bodybuilder’s physique sends out very strong messages of masculinity to other men, which they subconsciously find threatening. When people see bodybuilders they also see dedication, seriousness, size and strength.
Also, in modern society even though men don’t fight over women or goods, a bodybuilder with this intimidating size and strength can beat a smaller guy if he wants to, while the smaller guy cant (physically) no matter what his social status. Sometimes martial artists also face this kind of ‘hatred’ or ‘envy’ from the general public (men) because of the fact that they are learning or have learnt how to defeat another man physically. But what makes it worse for a bodybuilder is that his appearance itself does the talking, in comparison to a martial artist who has to prove his fighting skills.
Women also find muscles and some size a positive trait in their men, as it again ensures that they are with someone that can protect them. This again is a deep-seated subconscious feeling and is not overt. In the animal kingdom it is about the strongest male that they want to mate with, so that the off-springs that they produce have the best possible genes. Though many studies have proven that women don’t really prefer very big muscular men, studies have also proven that men always presume that women would find them more attractive if they(men) had more size then what they have.
It is a deep seated desire in men to be strong and when they see someone that is stronger, then the easiest and only possible way to bring him down becomes by way of non-direct confrontation. Which is why one sees a lot of myths perpetuated about bodybuilders like bodybuilding makes your penis small; bodybuilders only eat, sleep and train; bodybuilders cant have proper sex; bodybuilders die young; bodybuilding is bad for ones heart, etc.
Many times bodybuilders are criticized for being ‘too big’ and therefore looking ‘gross’, assuming that bodybuilding makes them look that big. An absolute contradiction to a bodybuilders ‘look’ is a marathon runners ‘look’. The marathoner will also have muscles, but they would definitely not show the same hypertrophy as seen in a bodybuilder. But, marathoners are never criticized for being ‘too small’ and therefore looking ‘gross’.
From a health point of view marathon running is also proven to produce negative health affects; from greater susceptibility to colds, to knee and lower-back damage from the repeated impact, to loss of lean-body-mass, etc. The reason why marathoners do not don’t get criticized is because a marathoners physique does not send out any strong signs of masculinity. The average man doesn’t see a marathon runner to possess a threatening and overpowering body.
There is no doubt that using steroids does have potential side-effects, but most men who demean bodybuilding don’t do it because of elite bodybuilding’s link with steroids alone. Many athletes in other sports are also caught for using steroids but do not face the same ridicule. Seeing a man that is well built and getting attention builds a lot of insecurity in those that do not possess these qualities.
Past experiences or situations where one sees big muscular men in positions demanding physical strength (Bouncers in night clubs, debt-collectors, etc.) can magnify these feelings of weakness and insecurity. Past childhood experiences of bullying by bigger boys in school can also be responsible for this.
Bodybuilders also seem to be enjoying their ‘own world’ of training in the gym, and this is also annoying to others who see a bodybuilder as a kind of ‘at peace with himself human’. And not many activities or professions give this kind of a feeling to the man that doesn’t train. A bodybuilder is also at ease with his body and wouldn’t mind showing his body to others, and certainly doesn’t feel awkward admiring his own. Every human being (man or woman) that looks in a mirror wishes to see himself or herself in some good form, but mostly don’t. The bodybuilder’s fascination with his own body and his confidence about it could be un-nerving to those that are not happy with the way they look. So seeing someone that does enjoys his own reflection in a mirror creates envious feelings towards them.
It is seen that there are two types of reactions that are the outcome of seeing a bodybuilder. One is of awe and one is of envy. So when a man sees a bodybuilder he is either going to be openly impressed with the size (awe), or will show envy due to his own inborn deep-seated insecurity (envy). The sociological research is still ongoing and it would be very interesting to see its total outcome
that’s extremely in depth abt bodybuilding.. now we are somewhat enlightened.. thanks, The Sandman! :D
The Sandman: Yes, thanks for that. I read it twice even.
Sorry for my late reply gentlemen/ladies. Been a little busy lately :D
I found that article rather interesting actually. Ever since I picked up my first dumbell 6 years ago, I have on numerous occasions faced critcs like the ones u may read of above. It has always dawned on me that it was primarily due to jealousy than any other reason.
Let it motivate you instead of work against you. Keep the iron moving mates
Cheers!
benjamin: So how have you been progressing lately? By the way.. 8kg in a month.. hmmm.. you may have lost quite a bit of muscle tissue there… did you starve yourself? How drastically did you change/reduce your food intake?
As a guideline, normally 1kg of weightloss per week is safe, and there shouldn’t be loss of muscle tissue if you’re eating well and exercising appropriately. Any more, and you may be losing precious muscle.. :(
The Sandman: I like your attitude. Very much.
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